my fears and haters

I just started to promote the future release of my book, and I am nervous. Nervous as fuck! I can see in my peripheral my fears and my haters.

I went to Facebook and invited all my friends to my page. Dear Lord, I think my fingers were trembling a little.

I am imagining what people will be saying about me. I am sure it isn’t as bad as I think, but my worst enemy is talking shit about me big time. My worst enemy is me. I realize this, I accept it, and I have to deal with it. It isn’t about ego, but of how you view yourself as a person. What you tell yourself, your mind will accept. Right now, my mind is accepting that I am not able to complete my endeavor.

So what do I do? How do I dispel this lack of confidence? How do I break through this glass ceiling? Well, first I have to face my fears and my fears are…

  • I will fail.
  • I will make a fool of myself.
  • People will talk and laugh behind my back.
  • They will call me out as a fraud.

Does any of this sound familiar? I am just like you, but the one difference that we may not have is how we deal with it. I face it head-on, deal with it, keep moving forward and you should be doing the same. Let me show you how it’s done.

Let’s take it one by one:

I will fail?

Yes, I might, but do I want to fail or regret it? What will make me stronger: fail and learn or look back and regret? I have regrets in life, I know how it feels. For the longest time, I kept saying that everything that had happened had brought me to this one point in time and this one point in time is good. I was lying to myself, regret was nagging at me, eating me from my unconscious.

So what to do? fail and learn or have regret in back of my mind for maybe a lifetime? I will take the latter.

Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement. One fails forward toward success.

C.S. Lewis

I will make a fool of myself?

I do it every day, so why is this any different? Let’s face it. I am not the most graceful in any way what’s so ever. Not only physically, but mentally. I will never, ever make a person a fool when we are all fools. We don’t know everything, and even “experts” can learn something. We are all fools; I just have to have the mental attitude to do it, look like a fool, and keep moving forward.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.

Bertrand Russel

People will talk and laugh behind my back?

At this moment in time, because of COVID 19, we are confined to social isolation, and the state of Pennsylvania is in stay-at-home status. So let’s see, in my house, there are three persons: my wife, my daughter and myself. When people laugh, point, and make fun of me, they don’t come home with me. So why should it bother me?

Easier said than done, right? I am no stranger to being hurt by others’ comments and no-value criticism. It’s painful, but it is part of life. I am not a drama queen by any means, but people are going to hate, they are going to critique you with no value and will talk shit behind your back. Do you go home to them? When you log off Facebook, are they next to you? When you tweet, does it change anything immediate in your life? Didn’t think so, be resolute and let those people fuel you to be better than them. Trust me; it will drive them fucking crazy!

β€œI imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.”

James Baldwin

They Will Call Me Out As a Fraud?

There are many definitions of fraud, but the one that I will talk about is being an impostor. Some of us are sheep, and what we see are sometimes, erroneously, just plain not true. They are pictured for us by our surroundings. For example, They teach us to believe that success is being a millionaire, but the truth is that we choose what our success is. So am I an impostor because I don’t think that being a multi-millionaire is my success? I don’t think so.

I know for a fact that I will be called a fraud. Most likely by people close to me, most likely even some people that are reading this right now. It’s ok; indeed, it is. If you know what you are trying to do, be honest about it, then the world will see you by what you are trying to show. I am trying to show the world that I care, that I want the best for those around me, and that I want to be successful WITH the people around me. So why should I care what you call me?

The first and worst of all frauds is to cheat one’s self.

Philip James Bailey

Now I have faced my fears, my haters, and none of it is comfortable. Yet, it will set me free and keep me from being sucked under the mass amount of doubt that is happening in my life right now. It’s all good, an essential part of being successful is to be able to talk to me, to make sure to be able to believe in me. Not easy, but without it, the world will be so much harder.

Work Hard, Stay Humble.

Photo by Shamia Casiano from Pexels

Remember you can always grab my book, Accepting You Will Become a Success. You’ll be impressed.

Talking about the fears and haters in your life…

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